Aside

A Few Good Men

Happy almost-Thanksgiving, everyone! I wasn’t planning on blogging tonight, but to be honest, I am overflowing with gratitude, and need to get it out. Here’s why:

I write a lot about women’s issues, and tackle some tough topics regarding gender relations. My article about sexual harassment was posted on Red Letter Christians earlier today, and something one of the commenters said got me thinking. “…appropriate male modeling from respected adults is necessary, and because of that mature men need to be ‘urged’ to do so.  Moreso, their behavior should somehow be a model to the young women who observe them.

Bingo. As I wrote that article, I kept thinking about how much easier I had it than many of my peers, because I believed I was worthy of respect, and wasn’t afraid to demand it. Apparently, it’s not as much fun to bully people who respond with a calm, somewhat condescending lecture. (What can I say? After some of the things I had experienced in Africa, junior high boys just weren’t that intimidating.) But do you know where that confidence came from, how I knew I was worthy of respect from men at very young age? Because my father and grandfather always treated me, and the other women in their lives, with great care and respect.

I think quite a bit about the irony that many of the problems I talk about, such as abuse, have been a non-issue in my life. Again, due largely to the nurturing, protective influence of my father (and mother, of course) in my life.

And I seldom write a difficult article without remembering and appreciating the fact that much of my confidence and courage has been built on the bedrock support of the men in my life. It is my husband who has encouraged me to write, and made significant sacrifices to make it possible. When I was struggling to finish the most emotionally devastating article I’ve written to date, it was my father who I called in the middle of the night, bawling as he prayed for me over the phone. And my grandpa–can I even communicate the security of running into him at church, his thick, calloused hand landing heavily on my shoulder as the other clutches a white styrofoam coffee cup? “How ya doin’, kid? Okay?”

I’m more than okay, Grandpa. I’m blessed. In large part because of you, and the other men in my life.

Here are just a few of the things I’m thankful for:

Andy Williams

Grandpa:

For your godly influence. For sitting quietly in your chair at night, lamp at your elbow, reading your Bible. For putting the fear of God in my father growing up, that if he ever disrespected a woman he’d have YOU to deal with. 😀 For always making me feel safe, secure, and protected. For letting me spend summers at your house, and live with you during college. For choking up when you pray. For driving over to sing me to sleep when I was little and sick. For making my cousin Sam shovel the manure for my garden into the back of the truck, even though I’m a liberated woman and could do it myself. 😀

Larry Williams

 

 

Dad:

For your godly influence. For the spiritual disciplines you so faithfully tended, that overflowed and made a difference in your life, and mine. For never raising your voice at me. For taking me on “dates” throughout my teens, even when it meant going roller skating! For displaying the fruits of the Spirit so bountifully. For telling me that I could be anything I wanted to be, and you would always be proud of me. For being “too strict” about how late I could be out on dates, and putting the fear of God in every boy who wandered within fifty feet of our house–that if he disrespected me, he’d have YOU to deal with. 😀 For teaching me about God in just about every way possible, but mostly by loving me unconditionally.

Aaron and Jenny

Aaron:

Where do I even begin? Thank you for being a godly, gentle man who is worthy of incredible respect. Thank you for the courage you have displayed in your own life, and for encouraging me to do things I would never consider if you weren’t cheering me on. Thanks for thinking better of me than I think of myself. (Though you do that for nearly everyone, don’t you?) Thanks for all the dishes you’ve washed, the diapers you’ve changed, the owies you’ve soothed, the grocery runs you’ve made (even if they WERE to Menards) so I could have time to study and write. Thanks for caring about simple truths, for your passion to share Jesus with everyone you meet. Thanks for being the type of guy who even ATTENDS a Women’s Studies ice cream social, much less marries a girl he met there! 😀 You are God’s greatest blessing to me on this earth, and I am so, so thankful and humbled to be married to you!!!

Tack min Gud for vad som varit! (Thanks my God for what has been! From an old Swedish hymn of thanksgiving.)

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