Aside

Shove a Candy Cane in Your Mouth, and Shut It! Taming the Tongue, XMas Style

‘Tis the season for contentious status updates. Every year around this time, faithful followers of the Prince of Peace start picking fights with people who celebrate the “holidays,” and double-dog-daring the 3% of their Facebook followers who aren’t too chicken to do the same. I confess–the picture in this post was my temptation, a snarky “I know that ‘X’ actually stands for Christ, aren’t I smart” swipe at establishing the superiority of my position on the topic (which is, ironically, that we should quit being so immature and bratty about the whole thing). Pathetic, but true.

It isn’t only this blessed time of year that brings out the worst in people. Scroll through the comments section of any well-trodden blog, and it is easy to lose hope for American society, if not humankind in general. My brilliant and very funny sister-in-law once posted “My god–is there anything more depressing than the Yahoo comments section?” I couldn’t agree more. I switched to Google Chrome this spring for the sole purpose of preserving my mental health. It was that. Bad.

What makes otherwise reasonable people turn into blood-thirsty piranhas online? Or in any situation, for that matter? I have a theory. Outrage is a powerful emotion, one that makes us feel strong and superior. Outrage smothers feelings of vulnerability–it’s the battle cry outmatched warriors scream out as they run head-first into a hail of arrows, a wall of spears. Outrage is a wall, the heavily-guarded defense surrounding a wounded, hurting child who really, probably, just needs a hug, to be picked up and held in the safe arms of someone who loves them unconditionally.

There’s a community aspect to outrage, too, a sense of identifying with a certain group and standing in solidarity with their opinions. It’s a big, lonely world out there, and aligning ourselves with the like-minded makes us feel a little less alone. The impromptu brotherhood that congeals between people who are pissed about the same thing is an incredible thing to witness. MadMarnie281 is on my team, and HeloiseIH8U is on the other. Let’s tackle her, drag her down, pound the keyboard until she cries uncle runs away, too afraid to come back again. This is OUR turf, and heathens who vote for the “other side,” have a different opinion about immigration, or wish us “Happy Holidays!” aren’t welcome here! Once the trouncing is accomplished, MadMarnie281 and I can brush the cyber-blood off our hands, high-five each other, and go our separate ways, knowing that while we will never meet in real life, we accomplished something horrible together, and will always have the memories of the hot air we shared to keep us warm.

This doesn’t just happen in the blogosphere. Think of the Tea Party. Think of Occupy Wall Street. Suddenly, a rag-tag group of frustrated, despairing people found common ground–and hope–in their shared outrage. They found a place to belong. A place to be accepted. A place where they feel like they have some sort of significance, are contributing something to their world, are part of a greater whole. They found–dare I say–their church.

The only problem is, that sort of community, one that runs on anger and outrage, has little to do with the gentle Jewish rabbi who occupied Bethlehem 2,000 plus years ago. Here’s what his baby brother had to say about the matter, in James 3:

“5 Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a  great forest is set on fire by a small spark… 9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. 11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?… 17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. 18 Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.”

I love verse 17 especially: “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.”

The next time you’re tempted to engage in self-righteous one-up-manship or cyber-snark, ask yourself–is this pure? Peace-loving? Am I being considerate? Submissive? Full of mercy? Is this good fruit? Am I being impartial and sincere?

In that spirit–Merry Xmas, everyone!

(Disclaimer–I still think the picture in this post is hilarious, and certainly won’t judge your motives if you want to display David Mastroberte’s heartbreaking work of staggering genius on your profile. I’m the snot, not you. Thank you for the picture, David!)

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