What does it look like to live in a Christ-centered home committed to shared leadership and mutual submission, instead of gender hierarchies? I’m looking for guest posts on this topic, especially personal stories about how mutuality has played out (or not) in your relationships. Marriage is the focus, but I’d love some dating and engagement stories as well.
Some ideas to get your creative juices flowing:
-What are the benefits of mutual relationships, the victories and joys you have experienced? How have you struggled?
-If you moved from a hierarchical model to a mutual one, what was the catalyst for that change, and what was the transition like? What have you gained? Lost? Learned about God/yourself/your partner/others?
-How do you respond to the common arguments against non-hierarchical relationships? (Example: every relationship needs a “tie breaker,” men need respect and women need love, etc.) Have those ever been an issue in your relationship, and if so, how have you dealt with them?
-If you could tell your son/daughter/mother/step-father/pastor/friend/abused sister one thing about the importance of mutual relationships, what would it be?
I’m not finicky about the length of the post (although 500-1000 words is usually the most readable), and if you’ve already written on this topic, I’d be happy to repost it. You’ll get all sorts of linky love, of course, and I’d love to promote your books/ministry/services in your bio. If you have a story to share, email me at jennyraearmstrong@gmail.com
What a fantastic idea for a series! I might have a little story of my own to share, too. I’m excited for this!
Fabulous! I’d love a story from you!!!
This is a great idea. Could be really helpful just to let people know “this is the reality – this is how is works”. Hopefully I’ll have time later this week to write. Would love to!
Exactly! People need to hear the stories. I’d love it if you’d write one!
Love this idea. We just had a fun conversation with our children last night when the question of ‘who’s really in charge?’ came up. One boy said it was Dad, ‘because he’s bigger.’ The other boy said it was me (just to even things out.)
Isn’t that funny?
We have similar conversations with our younger boys–they want to figure out how everything works.
I’d love to write one! I was married in the Catholic Church at 30, attended a comp church for a long time, now in a less strict denomination. Does that sound interesting?
Absolutely! I would love that.
Hi Jenny Rae! My husband and I have just begun making this transition and so I’d love to write a little about it as well. Do we write it right here or send you a story through email? I did write a little story for CBE’s Arise about parenting in partnership but would love to write more for this. We too have four boys!
Dayna
Awesome, Dayna! I loved your piece for Arise (kindred spirit!), and would love to post your story. You can send it to me over email–you can also include a bio, photo (of you, or you and your husband, or whole family), and a link to a website, if you like. Looking forward to it!!!
These are stories that need to be told! Thank you for gathering them, Jenny!
You are quite welcome! I’m excited about it.
Excellent topic and a great idea to bring in more voices on the subject, Jen. Also, I love the new look here!
Tim
Thanks Tim!
What if the marriage failed? What if one walked away and dug into oneself and found out meaningful reasons, or faults that he or she needed/could have used to have to help the marriage work? Would this fall into this catagory?
It would! The primary focus of the series is on what makes marriages work, but there’s a lot to be learned from failed marriages as well. The only thing I would ask regarding posts of this sort is that they are about the person writing them, their struggles, growth, and process, and not the former spouse.
Thanks! As a christian woman I would never “trash” the former spouse. Just want to share MY experiance of growth, hope, and walking in God’s presence.
Sounds great!
My husband and I quickly realized that a marriage hierarchy is unsustainable even though we were raised to believe it was the ONLY model for godliness. It’s funny, because we have been functionally egalitarians all along. I am so happy to be learning that there are like minds. I am following this series on the edge of my seat. Keep the posts coming!
thank you for starting this series. i found your blog recently and devoured all of these stories. i need better examples than my parents showed me and are encouraging me to follow. i have already found a few in the writers here. thank you for your vision on this.